Saying Goodbye.

Posted on: October 3, 2011

I went to a funeral today. It was for a lovely lady whom I called Nanny W although she wasn’t my Nanny. She was a lot of other people’s Nanny but not mine, although it didn’t stop me calling her it.

She has always been part of my life and I have fond memories of her. I saw her at all of the usual events – weddings, christenings and funerals but also always on the day that someone in the family bought a new house. We’d all turn up as a family to help move boxes, pack and unpack and Nanny W, without fail, would arrive with her rubber gloves and cleaning products and would just get started. I will always associate her with the house moving process and it will never be the same again!

My uncle, her son, was very brave today. He arranged the whole funeral and followed his mother’s wishes to the letter. She has been laid to rest with her daughter who was taken too soon after a battle with breast cancer. Now, reunited, Mother and Daughter will look down on all of us hopefully hand in hand. I can’t imagine the pain of losing your child, even when they are adult. It’s simply unnatural, it’s the wrong way around. Nanny W had a close and supportive family around her but I can imagine that her heart will never have healed after losing her daughter.

What struck me today is the strength of my family. They have suffered an enormous amount of grief over the years. I was saddened to see my cousins having to act as pallbearers again and realising how many times I have seen them do this and we are all still so young.

Grief is a terrible thing. Death is so final. I sometimes feel overwhelmed with sadness. I am sad for my Uncle and cousins who are so deeply affected by Nanny W’s death. I hope that they can see that she sleeps peacefully now and that in time, their hearts begin to heal.

I know they will never read this but they should know that I love them all dearly and if I could take their pain away, I would. I am blessed to have the family that I have.

I’m sorry that this is a sad post but I want this blog to reflect my life in a real way and this has been my world today. I’d like to dedicate today’s post to Nanny W. Sleep well. God Bless.

Much love



3 Responses to "Saying Goodbye."

A lovely post in memory of Nanny W. x

Such a brave post brought tears to my eyes. I have lost so many this year – such a hard and final thing to deal with. Sending you lots of healing love and hugs xx

Hi Emma, thank you so much for leaving me a message. I’m so sorry to hear that you have had such a difficult year, I understand how it can feel. I’m sure you’re just waiting for New Year’s Eve so you can put 2011 to bed and start afresh. I’ve been there. Love and healing hugs right back at you. Keep in touch, it is better to share sometimes xx

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